Mother in law and daughter-in-law relationship, a family with chicken feathers all over the place
As the saying goes, every family has its own difficult scriptures to recite.
One of the particularly difficult books to read is the "Mother in Law and Daughter in Law Sutra".
In many families, there seems to be an insurmountable gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and conflicts and contradictions occur from time to time, making the entire family atmosphere tense and even affecting the stability of marital relationships.
How should mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along properly?
Experienced people tell you that behind the messy relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, there are often some common characteristics hidden.
As long as we avoid it, we can get along harmoniously.
- The mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship is not good, mostly because the husband does not protect his wife
In many families, the tension in the mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship is often closely related to the husband's role positioning.
When a husband fails to speak up in a timely manner and protect his wife's rights in the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and even chooses to remain silent or favor his mother, the mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship often deteriorates further.
I once watched a TV drama called "Double sided Adhesive", in which my husband Yaping always wavered when facing conflicts between his mother and wife, and could not clearly defend his wife.
On the one hand, he wanted to be filial to his mother, but on the other hand, he didn't want his wife to be wronged, which only deepened the conflict between the two sides.
This kind of husband's behavior of not protecting his wife has gradually deteriorated the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and the family has also fallen into crisis.
There is a saying:
The role of the husband is crucial in a family
Husband should play a "bridge" role in the mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship, respecting both mother and wife.
When there is a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the husband should take the initiative to step forward, understand the demands of both parties, and seek a solution that is acceptable to both parties.
At the same time, the husband should also pay more attention to his wife's feelings in daily life, so that she can feel the support and love from her husband.
In this way, even if there are occasional frictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, they can be resolved properly under the mediation of the husband. - Grandma interferes too much, husbands are mostly not independent
Everyone is an independent individual with their own way of life and values
In a family, if the mother-in-law interferes too much, it will not only affect the mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship, but also the marital relationship.
The reason why a mother-in-law can interfere too much is often because her husband is not independent enough.
In "The Golden Powder Family", Jin Yanxi's mother is a person who likes to interfere with her son's marriage.
She is picky about her son's wife Qingqiu and even tries to control their lives.
Jin Yanxi lacked the courage to resist her mother's interference and always remained submissive.
This non independent personality made it difficult for him to find a balance between his mother and wife, ultimately leading to the breakdown of his marriage.
The old saying goes, "A gentleman is different in harmony
Family members should respect each other, respect each other's differences and choices.
If the mother-in-law always tries to impose her own ideas on her son and daughter-in-law, it will inevitably cause conflicts and contradictions.
As a bridge connecting mother and wife, husbands should have their own opinions, learn to think independently and handle problems, rather than blindly following their mother's arrangements.
In this way, family relationships will naturally be harmonious, and mother-in-law relationships will also be improved. - The better the marital relationship, the better the mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship
When husband and wife are united, their benefits are cut off
In a family, the marital relationship is the core.
If the relationship between husband and wife is strong, mutual understanding and support, then they can face various problems in the family together, including mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships.
I have a great example around me.
Xiao Zhang and his wife have a very good relationship, often traveling and watching movies together, enjoying their world together.
When facing their mother-in-law, they always support each other and work together to solve problems.
Xiao Zhang will praise his wife's strengths in front of his mother, making her better understand and accept her; And the wife also takes the initiative to care for her mother-in-law, buying gifts for her mother-in-law and chatting with her.
Under their efforts, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has become better and the family has become more harmonious.
There is a saying:
Love can resolve all conflicts
When there is love between husband and wife, this love will be passed on to everyone in the family, including the mother-in-law.
Grandma will feel the happiness between her son and daughter-in-law, and will also show more respect for their lives.
At the same time, a good relationship between husband and wife can also make wives feel more secure, and they can handle their mother-in-law's criticism and dissatisfaction more calmly.
Therefore, couples should pay attention to the cultivation and maintenance of emotions, and jointly create a warm and harmonious family atmosphere.
The mother-in-law daughter-in-law relationship is an important component of family relationships, and its quality directly affects the harmony and happiness of the family.
To build harmonious family relationships, it is recommended to start from multiple aspects:
Husbands should be brave enough to take on the role of mediators and safeguard their wives' rights and interests;
Grandma should learn to let go and respect her son's choices and decisions;
Couples should pay attention to the cultivation and maintenance of emotions, and jointly create a warm and harmonious family atmosphere.
You treat me kindly, and I reciprocate with respect. Only by getting along in this way can we be more harmonious and harmonious.