I have too much about you
I have too much about you.
When sober, I can't let go of my reserve and dare not say that I like you. Only on a certain night when I am sentimental and lingering in my heart, or when I am drunk at a friend's party, can I dare to use my emotions to say that I like you. I have liked you for a long time.
Regarding you, September 2012 was the season we met. In a classroom of over forty square meters, I got to know you. We are classmates, classmates who are not yet familiar with each other. That sentence, 'Are you still tall?' was the beginning of my attention to you. Intentionally or unintentionally, I glanced at you from group four to group one, my cautious eyes afraid that you would notice, but also afraid that you wouldn't understand. I didn't dare to express my little liking. Later on, when they called and scolded each other, the conversation became tacit, and they said goodnight to each other, only then did they realize that they just liked each other, nothing else. I'm sure I like it, but I still dare not speak up. Just because you said one sentence in the crowd, you have been living in your heart ever since. I dare not approach and disturb you easily, because I am afraid of disturbing your pace of life; I dare not speak of love to you easily because I am afraid that doing so would be an offense and a factor that could harm our relationship.
About you. It was because of my fear that I witnessed you walking towards her with my own eyes. It's a fact that I like you, and it's also a fact that you have a girlfriend. I thought I would maintain this friendship without saying it out loud, but it was just a coincidence that it was winter vacation and you had a girlfriend. I still heard that I loved you so much, but it still didn't work out. So inexplicably, there was a feeling of enemies between me and her, perhaps as others say, two completely unrelated women in the world would either be friendly or hate each other because of a man. I can't be friendly with her, but it's not hatred either. It's just that you chose her, and I hope she loves you well, takes care of you, and even loves me. Since the day I fell in love with you, longing has become an addiction that cannot be stopped. Your every word, smile, frown, all touch my heart. A hundred thousand thoughts, only a strand of thought; Countless beauties, only one person in love. I am willing to wander and wander in your story for the rest of my life, willing to serve you with horses and horses, with horses following my lead. Even if you have never given me a promise, even if you have never given me half of love, I will still have no regrets or grievances.
About you. A college entrance examination has scattered us. Will graduation be the last meeting of our lives? I'm glad, we're not. Going your separate ways, you continued to attend university. It is gratifying that you are also in a different place, which cannot be considered as my scheming. It can only be said that your arrangement is just right for me. Later on, I also heard that she came to see you from her city, and what could I say at that time. She truly loves you, that's a fact. I have also told my best friend that there should be at least one time in my life when I forget myself for someone, without seeking results, companionship, ownership, or even love from you. I only hope to meet you in my most beautiful years. Meeting you in this life, I feel happy, even though it is mixed with various pains. I also fantasized about quietly going to your school, on a sunny afternoon, on your way to the classroom, to have a carefully prepared encounter with you,. But I didn't have time to meet you before you graduated. Love is a very mysterious thing, indescribable, unclear, constantly cutting, and confusing. In this world, there is a kind of love that knows no result, but still sticks to its place, unwilling to leave, even if it cannot hold onto a trace of your warmth, it still chooses to silently wait for you. Along the way, the door of the heart only opens for you, the mountain city only stays for you, the day only lingers for your beauty, and the night only lingers for you. Because I love you, even if my heart is stranded on a deserted island, I will still look at you with the most affectionate eyes, watching you happy.
About you. During a conversation, I said I was going home, and you said you were going home too. I never thought that in this season, we would be in the same city, but even if we were in the same city, the farthest distance is that we feel so far apart in the same city. I suddenly heard that you broke up, and I couldn't even express my feelings. I should have been happy, but I couldn't be happy. After four years, you have had ups and downs along the way, which can be considered true love. Why can't I be happy? Maybe I have become accustomed to silently liking you without seeking results. We have also made an offer before, and we finally made it that night. At first glance, I was very excited and had a hint of joy, but also a bit worried. I was worried that I might not be able to show you my best form, but more moved. Being able to walk side by side with you was something I couldn't even imagine when I was in school. If I were a leaf in the wind, I would hope to fall in the most beautiful posture, because I don't want you to see my sadness. Perhaps the beauty in this world is somewhat desolate, but fate is the silent waiting in the depths of clouds and water, the warmth of a piece of plain paper, and the most beautiful poetic line of time. We walked around the park, thinking it would be awkward and we would be at a loss for words. But as you spoke, we bathed in the evening breeze, and I enjoyed the feeling until you escorted me downstairs. When you were about to leave, I wanted to give you a hug and tell you how much I loved you. But I still haven't, just silently watching your departing figure, slowly fading away in the dark until it disappears around the corner. How I wish you could understand my silence, my silence, and my reluctance to speak. Sometimes you can't see me because I'm quietly hiding behind you; Sometimes you can't hear me because I secretly disguised myself with silence. Actually, I'm afraid of loneliness, but because of you, I can sink myself into deep loneliness; I am actually afraid of loneliness, but because you are tall and far away, and I am powerless. Even if you are bound by everything, as long as you need it, I will definitely do it without hesitation.
About you. You said you were going to join the army, but there was actually some joy in your heart. Because in the army, you may not like others, and I just want to wait for you with this lucky mentality, to break free from the constraints of others. I don't know if I'm late this time. Let me tell you, I like you. Let me tell you, I will wait for you, wait for you to come back. When you leave, I may not go to see you off, but if you tell me which city you are in, I will go see you.
In life, how many separations there are, how many reunions there will be. In the noisy world, there are always some lonely souls walking on the road of loneliness. Loving you is like a faint fragrance, passing through the vast sea of people and coming softly, like a clear dew in the flower, moistening people's hearts. It flows quietly in the passage of time, making meeting or not meeting, far away or within reach, all become a joy and expectation. Because I love you, time will no longer be carefree and confused; Because I love you, life will no longer be boring; Because I love you, all the twists and turns are worth it.
About you, my years are all about you, past, present, and future.