Only after the age of sixty did I realize that the greatest pain in a family is not poverty, but these three states

Life is like chess, every family is playing their own game of chess.

Some families are happy and harmonious, while others have hidden crises.

As the saying goes, every family has its own troubles.

As parents, by the age of sixty, their children have also established their own families and careers. What we are most looking forward to is having a family full of children and grandchildren, and a harmonious family.

However, reality often hits old parents hard, and real family pain may stem from the details we overlook.

The following three states, if they occur in any family, will make parents feel heartbroken.

01

Family affection gradually becomes indifferent, and family members become strangers

Many parents believe that as long as their children succeed in their careers, the family will definitely be happy.

But the reality is often that the relationships between family members are becoming increasingly indifferent.

I have a neighbor named Lao Li, whose son works as a senior executive in a large company and has good financial conditions.

But Lao Li said that his son rarely comes home once a year, and making a phone call is just a few hurried words.

The elderly couple were hospitalized due to illness, and the son only asked the secretary to deliver some supplements, while he was too busy to spare himself.

American psychologist Satya once said:

Family is not just a collection of blood ties, but also a bond of emotions

When family affection becomes indifferent, no matter how wealthy the family is, it is difficult to truly be happy.

Elderly people should be vigilant: material wealth does not equal spiritual wealth, emotional communication between family members is the fundamental way to maintain the family.

02

Conflict of values and deepening generation gap

The root of many family conflicts often lies in significant differences in values.

Especially in this rapidly changing era, the differences in thinking patterns between the elderly and young are becoming increasingly significant.

I know an old man named Zhang who always complains that his grandson spends all day playing mobile games and not doing his job properly.

But in Sun Tzu's opinion, Grandpa's ideas are too outdated and completely unfamiliar with modern society.

The dialogue between two generations is full of gunpowder, and the family atmosphere is very tense.

The philosopher Heidegger once said:

Understanding is the fundamental way of human existence

When family members cannot understand and respect each other's values, the family will lose harmony.

Older people need to realize that times are changing, and we also need to keep up with the times and strive to understand the ideas of the younger generation.

03

Lack of personal space, suppressing each other's growth

Many parents believe that family members should be together at all times in order to be happy.

But in fact, excessive intimacy may suppress everyone's personality development.

I have a friend named Lao Wang who spends his days around his son and daughter-in-law after retirement.

Helping to take care of children, doing household chores, and getting involved in every detail.

As a result, the son and daughter-in-law felt suffocated and the family conflicts continued.

Psychologist Jung once said:

Providing each other with space for growth is the best expression of love

When family members lack personal space, everyone feels oppressed and the family atmosphere becomes heavy.

Older people should understand that giving their children appropriate independent space can actually promote the harmonious development of family relationships.

04

As we age, we should reflect on how to avoid our families falling into these painful situations?

Firstly, it is important to value emotional communication and not let family relationships become indifferent.

Regularly organizing family gatherings and staying in touch are the key to keeping family bonds warm.

Secondly, we need to learn to understand and respect each other's values.

Listen more to the ideas of young people, explain your own views to them, and seek consensus.

Finally, each family member should be given appropriate personal space.

Respect each other's lifestyles, while showing moderate concern, do not interfere excessively.

True family happiness does not lie in external glamour, but in internal harmony and understanding.

Let us work together to avoid these painful states and compose a harmonious and happy melody for our families.

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